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December 01, 2004

The Creeping Time Deficit

While sitting in my project management class this evening, somehow scope, quality, time, and cost converged in my head with Magrathea ("where hyperspatial engineers sucked matter through white holes in space to form it into dream planets... to meet the exacting standards that the galaxy's richest men naturally come to expect") and the current presidential administration in this country (where econopolitical engineers suck wealth through ideological holes in the federal budget to form it into tax breaks and government contracts that the country's richest men sent them there to effect).

Perhaps if Douglas Adams had lived to write yet another installment to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, he would have included a subplot in which Ford walks into an engineering firm to comission research, design, and production of some super-advanced, not-yet-existent device that by would seem to Arthur to require years to complete—not to mention fail completely to save their arses from imminent pain and death or produce a drinkable cup of tea.

But Ford would be seem totally unconcerned about that while allowing the hostess to take them to an adjoining lounge for cocktails. By the end of their drinks, someone would present the miracle widget to Ford, Arthur would sputter incredulously, and then the Guide would explain about the extreme competition between technology companies. To meet the time requirements of customers or get goods to market sooner, businesses started using time travel to bring the end result to the paying party before they could drink the company into bankruptcy court at the hosted bar. Sometimes an entire species would evolve from bacteria, learn to use digital watches, and go extinct while sewing a centillion promotional items for the Galactic Bank.

whose ancestors invented triple-filtered distillation before the spear

Posted by Gary at December 1, 2004 01:27 AM | TrackBack
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